Set before the events of ‘Soul’, 22 refuses to go to Earth, enlisting a gang of 5 new souls in attempt of rebellion. However, 22’s subversive plot leads to a surprising revelation about the meaning of life.
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Set before the events of ‘Soul’, 22 refuses to go to Earth, enlisting a gang of 5 new souls in attempt of rebellion. However, 22’s subversive plot leads to a surprising revelation about the meaning of life.
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Watch 22 VS EARTH (2021) : Full Movie Online Free As a deadly virus ravages the world, Dr. Martin Lowery embarks on a mission to reach test site ATU327A, a research hub deep in the Arboreal Forest. The arduous journey, guided by park scout Alma, is set back by a nighttime attack that leaves the two bruised and shoeless. When they run into Zach, a man living off the grid, they gratefully accept his help. Zach’s intentions aren’t exactly what they seem, however, and a path out of the forest and into safety quickly fades as the line between myth and science blurs.
In honor of the new Gossip Girl revival coming to HBO, I will be recapping every episode of Gossip Girl. As someone who has been with the privileged, white Upper East Siders since the beginning, as a reader of the original books, and as a 27 year old still using her dad’s netflix account, I feel well qualified for the task. So let’s jump right in.
Our main players are: Gossip Girl. The narrator. They blog about every character in the show and every character is super invested in this blog. Kristen Bell narrates as ‘Gossip Girl,’ and she will continue to narrate this mysterious Gossip Girl until the final season when the writers pick a name out of hat and award that random character the title of Gossip Girl. Don’t bother guessing who it is yet, because trust me, the masterminds behind the show don’t know who it is yet either. Serena. She’s blond. Lily, Serena’s mom. Also blond. Blair. She’s brunette. Blair’s headbands. Blair’s headbands are their own characters. Blair is dating Nate. Dumb as a bag of really good looking rocks with terrible haircuts. Chuck. Nate’s best friend and rocking a haircut that Julius Caesar would wear if his hairdresser was from 2007. These are the rich Upper East Siders. Now onto the Brooklyn crew. Jenny. Another blond, but a trashier blond. Dan. Jenny’s brother. I do NOT like Dan. Rufus. Their dad and looks to be about the same age as everyone else. Which makes sense since the depth of his emotional maturity could fit inside of a thimble.
We open on Grand Central Station where Serena has just arrived from a stint at Boarding School. She politely poses at the top of the staircase so that everyone in NY can take a picture of her and send it to Gossip Girl. Serena’s first stop is to visit her mom, located at a fancy daytime party thrown by Blair’s mother, Eleanor. Serena cryptically asks her mom where ‘he’ is, but who cares about that because Blair is upstairs getting down and dirty with Nate. Hoping to get him the mood to deflower each other, she says to him,, ‘Love you. Always have always will.’ As we all know, nothing gets teenager boys hotter than declarations of commitment. Their Pg-13 make out is interrupted by news of Serena downstairs. Blair and Serena have a frenemy ice off, but we’re quickly shuttled off to the next scene before more than one passive aggressive insult can be tossed.
Next, we see what mystery ‘him’ Serena was alluding to, and it’s her little brother secluded in a rehab center nicer than my apartment, with the tell-tale white wrist bandage of soap opera suicide attempt. Serena accuses her mom of hiding her brother Eric away and lying about his true whereabouts with a vague ‘vacation’ excuse. But I’m going to have to side with Lily on this one…what is her mom supposed to say, Serena? “My son isn’t around to play Ultimate Frisbee with your son right now because he tried to kill himself, Karen.” It’s not really lavish day time party topic of conversation SERENA.
Back in Brooklyn, we’re back with Dan, Jenny, Rufus and Rufus’s leather corded necklace. Here we can see how poor they are in their giant poor person loft with its wall-to-wall sliding doors and beautiful crushed velvet couch. Dan pines after Serena in a way that is made exponentially more creepy if you’ve watched ‘You’ on Netflix, in which Pen Badgley (Dan) plays a stalker. Jenny whines about a party Blair is throwing. Rufus and Dan are judgmental about it. This is Rufus and Dan’s default setting.
Moving on from the Loft of Judgement, we find Blair and her minions, who are the only two people of color on the show, on the steps of the MET. The two minorities get to share all of their lines, speaking at once like Greek Oracles that shop exclusively at Claire’s. Blair specifically tells Serena she is NOT invited to her party, while Serena innocently scrapes at a cup of low-fat yogurt. I believe the yogurt symbolizes Serena’s vulnerability in this moment. Or maybe the director really wanted to film Blake Lively putting a spoon in her mouth. Discuss in the comments below.
Meanwhile, Nate is white boy whining to Chuck about how hard it is to be rich and have a hot girlfriend who wants to have sex all the time. Chuck says something rape-y so that we are not thrown off when he attempts to rape two different main characters later on in the episode. But honestly, his haircut was already saying everything we need to know.
That night, Blair and Serena get martinis at a bar that serves alcohol to 15-year-olds. I’ll give the bartenders a pass though, since both actresses are just shy of 30. They kiss and makeup, but they don’t actually kiss because lesbianism is something we are saving for later seasons. After Blair leaves, Chuck appears in all his soft spoken, misogynistic glory. He lures Serena into the vacant bar kitchen with promises of grilled cheese, which, girl, I get it. He forces himself on her and she punches him in the dick. Apparently this behavior is as normal as a 15 year old ordering a dry martini in the middle of the afternoon.
As Blair tries to get it on with Nate again, he apathetically tells us by way of flashback that he and Serena slept together. We can tell Serena was a bad girl in this flash back because her voice was slightly higher. Blair’s lip trembles as she tries to stay pretty and cry at the same time.
Luckily, a day later, all is forgiven! Blair is more mad at Serena than she is at Nate, because of Serena’s blondness, and Nate wants to stay with Blair because according to his dad its a good business decision(?)
It’s the night of the party! Dan successfully stalked Serena into a date night, which includes seeing his dad’s band in Brooklyn.
Oof. Serena is charmed by this because she hasn’t seen Dan’s new television show ‘You’ on Netflix yet.
Jenny is cornered at Blair’s party by our resident rapist Chuck, and everyone is super cool with it. They find themselves in an abandoned stairway, where Jenny starts to feel uncomfortable. But instead of leaving, she texts her brother Dan to come rescue her. I’ve never been one to victim blame, but Jenny. Just go home! He’s not even blocking the door! Look at his bangs! Go!
Luckily, Dan and Serena have access to a teleportation device that gets them from Brooklyn to the Upper East Side just in time to dramatically burst onto the rooftop to stop Chuck from the second rape attempt this episode. Dan storms forward in his stupid little scarf, proudly yells ‘I’m Dan Humphrey!’ and punches Chuck in the face. Thus ends the first episode of a show that has shaped our generation.
Some Stray Thoughts
-I was going to rank all of the girl’s outfits, but they change too many times to keep track
-At first I thought the actress who plays Blair’s mother looked very young this episode until I realized that it’s a different actress from the rest of the series. Did she not say her one line of the episode catty enough that they had to recast her?
-The way Serena’s mom Lily says ‘Cwoi-ssant’
-There’s a whole storyline between old flames Lily and Rufus wherein Lily shows up to Rufus’s crummy art gallery and says to him ‘stay out of my life Rufus.’ I wish I was bold enough to bust into people’s lives 20 years after our affair and tell them to leave me alone apropos of nothing